salience

Random Michelle-isms, a tribute, if you will, before she goes home this afternoon.

At about 2:30 in the morning today, I was typing up my spanish paper and Michelle was sitting in her butterfly chair attempting to write a psych paper.
Me: I'm going to listen to some calm music and get this paper done!
Michelle: like U2? Hey....
Me: Hm?
Michelle: If there's a band called U2, why not have one called Me3?
Me: Did you just say mithriel?
Michelle: No, Me3.
Me: Oh...I was trying to give you some credit.


Just now, as Michelle is on the floor sorting through clean and dirty clothes so she can pack:
Michelle: Would you like a spritz of freesia fantasy? (holding up a bottle she just found under her bed)
Me: Um....no.
Michelle: But it's a fantasy....of Freesia..(sprays from bottle, which encompasses the entire room in a sickly sweet smell)
Me:.....lovely.....
(some minutes later)
Michelle: oh I'm sticky, I don't want to smell like a Freesia fantasy anymore....I smell like a cheap whore...
(I sit in triumphant silence, having avoided the cheap whore syndrome)

(some minutes later)
Me: Michelle, come read what I wrote.
Michelle: k....
(Michelle reads)
Michelle: whore?! what?! Aaaahhhh!
(goes and gets the spray and commences to assault me with it...I too now smell like a cheap whore.)
Me: Oh I've just been violated!!! (in my Chris Rock voice)
Michelle: Now who's the cheap whore?!?!
(three second pause)
Michelle: Wait, it's really stinky in here....we need to spray something else! Ew!
Me: Definitely. Here. (I grab the CVS Lysol, spray the room and Michelle)
Michelle: I hope we don't get cross-smellification!!
Me: Me too! That would just be nasty!
(three second pause)
Michelle: oh! It's even worse!
Me: We so have cross-smellifiction! I need to sit down, I'm getting light headed.
Michelle: Damn you, Freesia Fantasy....