salience
December 11, 2002
Oh my goodness, what a plethera of emotions I am feeling right now.
I called my mom tonight, like I always do on Wednesday nights, to check up on her. We have this rather abnormal relationship: she is my mother, but we are more like friends who lean on one another for support. I tell her what I'm going through and vice versa. Wednesday nights are usually the highlight of my week, because it is a haven from normal life. Something intangible that I rely on for strenth. Well tonight, I hung up the phone feeling flattered, and scared, and just plain confused.
My mom and I had a pretty normal conversation. We talked about everything that had happened since Sunday, the other time during the week when I call, and what not. How my brother won another wrestling tournament in his weight class, how the twins are doing in school, how my dad's friends are doing, and what needs to be done before the extended familia take over the house for Christmas and the Renewal. Conversation had slowed, and we were at the normal lull before the end of a phone call, and out of nowhere my mom goes, "I want you to have my Opus with you in Boston." I swear I stopped breathing. An Opus is a prestigious performance model clarinet. My dad bought it for my mom for her 40th birthday for an ungodly amount of money. It is so nice and beautiful and lovely and tone quality is amazing on it and it has extra keys and I could go on forever. I have only played on it once. This is my mom's baby, her pride and joy, the only tangible thing she has to remind her that she was once a performace major, all those years ago. Why the hell is she going to give it to me? I am not a performace major, I'm not even majoring in music. The only musical things I do are marching band, if that can count as musical, concert band, and most likely Woodwind Ensemble. YIKES! What the hell is she thinking??
::sigh::
All I know is I have been playing on my mom's Buffet--the clarinet she used in college (it's an R9, a model that they stopped making in the 60s), for eight years now. It is my home when I play clarinet, we get along just great. Yes, it is an old instrument, and it doesn't look flashy by any means, but.... It's enough, y'know?
I have enough.
I called my mom tonight, like I always do on Wednesday nights, to check up on her. We have this rather abnormal relationship: she is my mother, but we are more like friends who lean on one another for support. I tell her what I'm going through and vice versa. Wednesday nights are usually the highlight of my week, because it is a haven from normal life. Something intangible that I rely on for strenth. Well tonight, I hung up the phone feeling flattered, and scared, and just plain confused.
My mom and I had a pretty normal conversation. We talked about everything that had happened since Sunday, the other time during the week when I call, and what not. How my brother won another wrestling tournament in his weight class, how the twins are doing in school, how my dad's friends are doing, and what needs to be done before the extended familia take over the house for Christmas and the Renewal. Conversation had slowed, and we were at the normal lull before the end of a phone call, and out of nowhere my mom goes, "I want you to have my Opus with you in Boston." I swear I stopped breathing. An Opus is a prestigious performance model clarinet. My dad bought it for my mom for her 40th birthday for an ungodly amount of money. It is so nice and beautiful and lovely and tone quality is amazing on it and it has extra keys and I could go on forever. I have only played on it once. This is my mom's baby, her pride and joy, the only tangible thing she has to remind her that she was once a performace major, all those years ago. Why the hell is she going to give it to me? I am not a performace major, I'm not even majoring in music. The only musical things I do are marching band, if that can count as musical, concert band, and most likely Woodwind Ensemble. YIKES! What the hell is she thinking??
::sigh::
All I know is I have been playing on my mom's Buffet--the clarinet she used in college (it's an R9, a model that they stopped making in the 60s), for eight years now. It is my home when I play clarinet, we get along just great. Yes, it is an old instrument, and it doesn't look flashy by any means, but.... It's enough, y'know?
I have enough.
lasaliente, 23:32
