salience

What would you say if I told you I am content? No, not happy. Not dizzy with giddiness. This is no fleeting emotion: it's a state of mind.

I've had a separate existence here at BC for quite some time now: friends, professors, experiences unique to this school. And I've constanly struggled to bridge the gap between this world and what is dear to me in Alpharetta. Now I am learning there is no need to build anything: I am the bridge.

A week ago I was down. Valentine's Day was really rough for me last year, being away from all of the loves in my life. It would be an understatement to say I was not looking forward to last Friday. Michelle was trying to console me, saying I was lucky to have loves to miss.

But--I still did not want to get out of bed that morning.

The day was normal, with the occassional Valentine card here and there. Michelle and I watched our afternoon of TLC, I did some laundry, and she picked up the room a little. With strong resolve, she started to sort laundry. Anyone who knows Michelle, understands her doing laundry is an event. After organizing her colors, she said she was going to the basement to check for an open washer. Out she went and I was left with TLC, AIM conversations, and a heavy heart.

I remember cursing IE, 'cause my computer is constantly plotting my demise, when I heard the code being punched and the door opening. I didn't look up--just continued with my computer musings. I heard this familiar voice say, "Hey." Except, it wasn't Michelle. I looked up, and standing in my doorway was Logan!

I couldn't breathe, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

I sat in shock for a few moments, then lept out of my chair, and burst into the hallway screaming.

Once I calmed down, he told me he had been plotting with Michelle to surprise me for Valentine's Day for some time. I was so happy, and so thrilled. I like to think it's hard to surprise me, and I had no clue!

It still fascinates me, the entire ordeal. From him plotting, to the candy he brought Michelle, to the breath-taking necklace and cuddly dog he gave me, to us going on Michelle's blind date with her, to my concert at NEU, to the blizzard, to playing in the snow with him, to waking up to having his arms around me, to him staying twice as long as he intended due to the airport shutting down.

And now, here I am. Logan is back in Alpharetta. I am left with so many memories, so many more reasons to love him.

It is hard to put into words the elation of a lover's handwriting, fingerprints, and cologne remaining after he has left.

Content.