salience

The latest:

::my brother calls me on my cell phone during my lunch hour::

Him: So, Moose...
Me: So? Why am I graced with your voice?
Him: Say what?
Me: Man... All attempts at civility with you are lost causes. Why the hell are you calling me?
Him: Oh... Ha! I get it! You were--
Me: Trying to explain that you're a dip--
Him: So, KFC called me back.
Me: Ah, your favorite dining establishment.
Him: Shyeah! Man, I hate eating there...
Me: So?
Him: So they want me to "interview" today.
Me: Cool, man. Would you get free food? Cause you know "free" always makes it taste better....
Him: Except at the banks, man. Those lollipops are nasty. Do you think I should pretend I don't speak English?
Me: You couldn't pull it off. You got the name, that's enough.
Him: So... what should I wear?? T-Shirt? Yes. With or without the undershirt?
Me: With.
Him: What about the UnderArmour?
Me: Man, if you're going to go all out, and wear the under-under shirt, just wear a Polo shirt.
Him: I hate Polo shirts.
Me: Yeah, they don't ever fit you right.
Him: But I would look more Mexican, you know--like I need the money...
Me: So you can buy a shirt that fits??
Him: Maybe I should do my Cheech impersonation...
Me: You're too tall...
Him: Dammit...
Me: Man, it's KFC.... Remember??
Him: Yeah, yeah, I know....
Me: What time is your thing at?
HIm: Whenever I get my butt down there...
Me: Well, don't be too much of an ass, you know how us mexicanos can be.
Him: Especially--
Me: At KFC. But the real question is, can you be a respectable ass at a chicken place?
Him: You know it. But, they got enough nalgas (ass) down there as it is. ...chicken, I mean.
Me: But you don't want to be compared to a chicken's ass.
Him: Good point. Nothing worse than being called the ass of a chicken no one wants.
Me: Exactly. Bye man, I'll see you when I get home. Good luck.
Him: Eh, we'll see how it goes. Bye.