salience
July 23, 2003
It's an eerie, unfamiliar fog.
It happens in flashes. Blinding, then vivid. Detailed.
listerine
your eyes
the feel of your clothes
the Jeep
All metallic mainstays of my subconscious, reflecting a warmth behind my eyes. I was smiling, ignorant, content, secure.
Maybe the listerine was covering up more than just your smoking.
Maybe your eyes had that sincere look when you made the call.
Maybe you were wearing those beige corduroys when you told me you were too sick to see me.
The only thing I know for sure is the Jeep you drove to the bar is no longer recognizable.
You are one superb actor. I truly believed you: I shared everything with you. I took it for granted that you would always tell me everything. I took your silence for reflection. It never once crossed my mind that you were in denial, that you were hiding from me.
Now I notice the little pieces of you in my thoughts.
I have the tangible you memorized, yet all I ever knew was a mask.
But things have not changed, really.
Aside from the slight shift to the right, I remain alone.
It happens in flashes. Blinding, then vivid. Detailed.
listerine
your eyes
the feel of your clothes
the Jeep
All metallic mainstays of my subconscious, reflecting a warmth behind my eyes. I was smiling, ignorant, content, secure.
Maybe the listerine was covering up more than just your smoking.
Maybe your eyes had that sincere look when you made the call.
Maybe you were wearing those beige corduroys when you told me you were too sick to see me.
The only thing I know for sure is the Jeep you drove to the bar is no longer recognizable.
You are one superb actor. I truly believed you: I shared everything with you. I took it for granted that you would always tell me everything. I took your silence for reflection. It never once crossed my mind that you were in denial, that you were hiding from me.
Now I notice the little pieces of you in my thoughts.
I have the tangible you memorized, yet all I ever knew was a mask.
But things have not changed, really.
Aside from the slight shift to the right, I remain alone.
lasaliente, 11:07
